I love the show Claws and I love how getting my nails done makes me feel. Nails are a way to express yourself if done by the right person. A nail tech that can capture the essence of your personality is invaluable.
The picture above is the work of my girl @annicures (on iG)!! When I sit in front of Annie we talk about everything from relationships to religion. The 1st full set Annie did captured the freak in me lol..super long with 🦄 chrome.
I was straight feeling myself!! Until I jabbed my index finger into my car door, ring finger into a fucking kitchen cabinet and my thumb something like a fucking belt loop. Much like the freak in me these nails were causing more trouble than it was worth. Note I asked Annie to hook me up!!
It became clear to me through wearing these nails that my friend with benefits feeds the needs of my flesh not my soul. I have to constantly remind myself that I need a man that cares about my mental not just my physical. The attention my nails brought me fed my ego, the thought of having two men long for me feeds my ego. However behind closed doors I suffer, whether it’s from banging up my nails or the emotional damage of realizing the man I gave my body to doesn’t care about me as a person.
The crazy part is I can commit to a nail tech but struggle to commit to one man. I messaged Annie and said I can’t do long nail life we have to go short. Annie says « oh you need ´mommy nails’ », I said damn that doesn’t sound sexy at all. But deep down inside I knew I could get the satisfaction of feeling sexy, & desired through the attention of the « friend with benefits » with mommy nails and all. What am I missing? Why can’t I commit? Why is the need for outside attention so high? How can I change? What will be my next full set??